2.1.15

abhaya mudra

lately i was re-inspired to manifest and photograph some of the mudras.  since recently learning about the goddess buvaneshwari in my training i have fallen in love with abhaya mudra, or fearlessness gesture. this ancient mudra represents fearlessness, protection, friendship, peace and dispelling fear.  the bent right arm with an open palm held at shoulder height displays an absence of weapons and aggression.  this gesture is the spontaneous expression that manifests with enlightenment and it holds space for creativity.  give it a try! namaste bitches, xx.

4.19.14

 

garudasana

i'm sort of slacking on the yoga-ness of the blog lately.  i am still, in my life, practicing yoga.  but we've moved back to the states, i haven't been teaching and i'm feeling uninspirational.  i'm learning a lesson lately, having nothing to do with asana and having everything to do with acceptance.

i'm learning about accepting life's unexpected trials, accepting another imperfect person's imperfections, accepting my own.  i'm learning about not struggling to change what i can't change.  i'm learning about allowing.  these are hard for me.  as a perfectionist and a control-freak i subconsciously (or consciously) feel like my actions can dictate outcomes.  but sometimes, especially when it comes to other people and their behaviors, they can't.  sometimes it's best to just realize that control is a complete illusion.

it's liberating, also scary, this acceptance trip.  it requires courage, trust, love and faith even as it tests those virtues.  when you're a fighter and a survivor the instinct to struggle and overcome is as vital as oxygen.  but to evolve you have to lay aside these instincts - rooted as they are in fear and restriction - and you have to allow.  so that's what i've been working on lately; allowing.  accepting. and loving.

but here's a yoga pose anyway, for good measure.  namaste bitches, xx.

"To find ease and a feeling of freedom in the pose, it might help to think about the myths behind Garudasana's name. Garuda, though often translated as "eagle," is actually a mythical bird in the Hindu and Buddhist traditions. As the vehicle of the god Vishnu, Garuda is said to be the king of birds. In Tibetan traditions, the garudas are considered a magical species; they are often described as "outrageous" because of their extraordinary ability to fly and fly and fly... and never land. They never have to land because they never get tired. And they never get tired because they ride the wind.
In Garudasana your body might feel awkward and constricted, but you can still ride the wind like an eagle. "Riding the wind" means riding the flow or energy of any situation or any challenging pose. Not to be confused with going with the flow or getting bowled over by circumstances, riding the energy of a situation means remaining open to what is occurring and finding a way to become stable, spacious, and steady within that situation, without resistance. When you resist, you're more likely to get tired and give up. In Garudasana, resistance will likely cause you to tense up and lose your balance. But when you stay open to possibilities, even when faced with obstacles, you may find that your energy renews itself endlessly." 
-yoga journal

4.10.14

standing mermaid

This pose combines the strength and balance of Natarajasana (or dancers pose) with the invigorating back-bending of mermaid.  Needless to say - it's challenging.  Don't even try it unless you're warmed up, and/or super bendy.  This is one of those poses that really demonstrates how important it is to breathe and focus while remaining both strong and fluid.  You will probably fall if you rush it.  There's a metaphor in there somewhere....

* Shift your weight into your standing leg (let's say your left).

* Bend your right knee and take hold of your inner ankle with your right hand (palm facing out).

* Keeping your hips square, lift and press your foot up as you shift slightly forward and start bringing a bend into your back, as if you are going into dancer.

* Instead of pressing back with your foot, and reaching with your arm; keep lifting your foot up and work your toe, foot or ankle into the crook of your right elbow.

* Keep lifting, back-bending and balancing as you reach straight up with your left hand.

* Breathe.

* Slowly bend your left elbow and reach back to clasp your right hand.

* Breath deeply, opening your chest, arching your back, squaring your hips, and lifting your right leg.

* To come out slowly release your clasp, then gently release your right foot.  Take a few deep breaths standing in mountain pose, then do the other side.

* Once you've done both sides, do a nice, lazy, bent legged forward fold to release the tension in your back.

Namaste bitches, xx.

2.19.14

apple pie smoothie

it may not look like much in the photo (no food stylist, don't care) but this is one of my very favorite smoothies.  i make it all the time.

- one banana
- one apple - in slices
- one big scoop (about 1/2 a cup at least) of *full fat greek yogurt
- 1/2 cup almond milk
- spoonful of agave 
- healthy helping of cinnamon 
- as much coconut water as you desire

~ optional - a handful of almonds

blend well and enjoy!

if you want to make a vegan, or non-dairy version just sub the yogurt for a scoop of vanilla vegan protein. we use vega sport performance in our house.  remove the agave because these powders are usually sweet enough.

*side note: dairy products that say *low fat or *non-fat are full of sugar.  sorry but it's true.  they remove the delicious fat and trick your taste buds into thinking it's still delicious by pumping up the sugar.  stick to full-fat, it is better than sky-high sugar carbs.  namaste bitches, xx.

1.4.13

love over fear

i feel this energy in the air, this undercurrent i'm sensing, this spark which i hope becomes a flame; of self acceptance.  it's been building and building, or should i say we've been tearing down; tearing down outdated opinions about 'the norm'.  we've been tearing down antiquated beliefs about what love looks like, about what beauty is.  there's a lot left to dismantle but lately i've been sensing some momentum in the wrecking.  

i'd like to throw my voice into the greater conversational hum. 

healthy is beautiful, whatever height or weight it comes in.  taking care of your precious body so it can carry you through this life is an act of beauty and honor.  it's a privilege.  let's agree that being happy and healthy in the body you have outshines being unhappy in one you're constantly starving or shaming or disguising.  

love is aspirational.  not conditionally, not for some people, not depending on who you love, all love.  and let's not forget self-love.

fear is a choice.  it may feel otherwise, you may feel hemmed in, trapped and constantly bombarded by all the many things there are to be afraid of.  you may feel overwhelmed by all the many chances that are scary to take because they may be unwise.  unwise to whom?  who decides this?  you.  you decide. you choose.  fear is a choice.

i'll try to remember this if you will.  namaste bitches, xx.

10.19.13

getting my backbend back

"it must not be just your mind or even your body that is doing the asana.  you must be in it.  you must do the asana with your soul.  how can you do an asana with your soul?  we can only do it with the organ of the body that is closest to the soul - the heart.  so a virtuous asana is done from the heart and not from the head.  then you are not just doing it, but you are in it.  many people try to think their way into an asana, you must instead feel your way into it through love and devotion."

- bks iyengar

10.18.13

 

                                                                                     yogatimecore

i rolled out a new class i really like today.  for those who can read my scribbling there's a killer core workout in there.  here's the playlist:

- know the way (outro), visions, grimes
- rosa, geidi primes, grimes
- wandering star (ft. mike noyce) , give you the ghost, POLICA
- i'm a lady (diplo remix ft. amanda blank), top ranking, santogold
- run hide (ft. diplo & amanda blank), the trouble gang mixtape, trouble andrew
- chain my name, shulamith, POLICA
- i'm good, i'm gone, youth novels, lykke li
- let's get busy, a color map of the sun, pretty lights
- this head i hold, mondo, electric guest
- breezeblocks, an awesome wave, alt-j
- brutal hearts, light the horizon, bedouin soundclash
- cover my eyes (costra nostra edit), lazerproof, major lazor & la roux
- lay your cards out (alluxe remix), dark star remix, POLICA
- don't move, nightlife, phantogram
- tessellate, an awesome wave, alt-j
- a gentle dissolve, the cosmic game, thievery corporation

10.15.13

 

                                                                                               back to yoga!!!

take a wide stance, turn your front foot forward, bend your front knee, ground your back foot at an angle, open your hips, sink down deeply - as deep as you can keeping you front knee over your ankle, lift out of your front hip, center your shoulders, roll them down your back, lift your arms, extend through your fingertips, don't lean forward - stay perfectly upright, find a spot to gaze beyond your front fingertips, lift your chin, breathe, feel your energy expand from your core into your legs, into your feet, into the earth, feel your energy expand from your heart through all your limbs and out your fingertips, all around you,  feel your energy expand from your crown, lift, settle, breathe.  

one arm reaches into the past, one arm reaches into the future.  you are in the middle, perfectly balanced in the present.  do not observe the pose happening to you.  embody this pose.  be a warrior.  not a warrior of aggression but a warrior poised to strike down obstacles.  identify your obstacles, recognize your tools, define your desire and purpose and breathe.   

how long can you stay here, in this present moment?

"..Sometimes he danced; sometimes he laughed aloud; sometimes he stood wrapt in meditation; sometimes he trampled upon the earth; sometimes he sang; sometimes he wept repeatedly: and he was endowed with the faculties of wisdom, dispassion, power, penance, truth, endurance, fortitude, dominion, and self-knowledge..."

- description of the warrior virabhada, the vishnu purana

10.10.13

csa day

drink a bit more water,  eat a few more veggies, practice breathing deeply,  have alot of sex,  smile more in general, do some yoga obviously,  don't take life so seriously and chill the fuck out.  namaste biches! xx.

10.8.13

reverse namaste bitches, xx

injury has humbled me, forced me to slow my practice, turned me inwards; curling, protecting myself.  i have the feeling of taking steps backward, of being weakened and having to rebuild.  i have feelings of impatience as my body struggles with poses and positions once natural and easy.  

but i feel lucky also, as though the pain is bringing a new level of experience for me.  the caution with which i move, the awareness i experience through every movement brings a depth i didn't attain before.  with every bit of myself i am aware of my body.  "does this hurt?  is this ok?  does this feel right?"  i ask in every moment.  

i notice how often i have the urge to go further, push further into a posture before taking a moment to notice where i am.  

i am going to retrain my body.  i am going to relearn my placement, alignment, regain my strength, and i am going to do it with complete awareness and patience.  

"if we confront affliction through yoga, we awaken a new awareness of tolerance and endurance, as well as a true sympathy for others in their afflictions.  these qualities indicate the degree of development we have reached.  so why not take adversity positively?  certainly it is an alarm signal, but also contains the seed for its own resolution and transcendence."

-b.k.s. iyengar

9.29.13

 

                                                                                   om khagaaya namaha

lately i've been thinking alot about intention.  you hear the word thrown around alot, especially in yoga class.  hell i throw it around alot too. 'take a moment and set an intention for you practice,' or 'remember the intention you set at the beginning of your practice.' etc. etc.  intention has become a mental exercise.  you set your intention with your mind in the beginning, you come back to it in the end.  you visualize.  you focus your thoughts, this is how we've become accustomed to recognizing, willing and working with our intentions.  

intention in action is much much more than this.  intention is a visceral, physical push.  it is a willful act of mind and body working as one.  those who have pushed their practice to another level by manifesting their mental intentions in their physical bodies know what i'm talking about.  you can set as many intentions as you want to; if you don't feel your intention in every sweating, straining ounce of muscular will you aren't quite there yet.

as a society we've obviously widened the gap between our physical world and our day to day reality.  we've become removed from our food, our weather, our climate.  we seek to ease physical feelings of discomfort or chaos with pills, booze, food and whatnot, instead of examining what they mean to our overall organism.  and it's understandable.  physical reality can be a bitch.  i've lived many lives and the one lived close to the earth, off the grid and in sync with the daily cycles of sun, moon, tide, was by far the most rewarding and also the most inconvenient and physically challenging.  when i think of my time in the wild i think of marvelous beauty, breathtaking simplicity, elemental purity, and deep deep physical discomfort. 

the only way through this discomfort was to accept it as part of the intentional living i was taking part in.  

this extends to everything.  the only way to achieve your intention is to live it.  to physically manifest it and to accept the discomfort it may temporarily cause.  so on a grander scale; the intention is to live simply, with nature, off the grid.  the result of manifesting that intention is hard physical work, intense amounts of effort and time for very basic necessities and foregoing simple luxuries like daily showers or refrigeration.  on a smaller scale; the intention is to do a handstand.  the result is sweat, work, muscle fatigue as you build a strong upper body to support you, doubt and frustration as you fall on your face (over and over) and the glory of achievement when your mental intention, your will and your physical effort unite to bring you into that perfect balance of inverted energy.

experiment with this, it doesn't have to be as challenging as a handstand.  in your next practice set a small intention and then physically enact it every single time.  or if you're not into yoga, set an intention for your day and then walk the walk.  two ideas:  in yoga, set an intention to completely engage your feet, hands, toes and fingers in each and every pose.  focus on their placement, alignment, force, energy.  focus on placing them with efficiency, beauty and strength.  in life, set an intention to be more positive, even during a challenging day.  in every reasonable circumstance say yes instead of no.  and then take it further and say absolutely.  is that your umbrella?  absolutely.  do you want to volunteer for ______?  absolutely.  want cheese with that?  absolutely.

anyway these are just ideas playing around in my mind.  obviously your intention is your own.  but no matter what it is, show up on every level; follow through physically to manifest mental realities.  and when it gets uncomfortable?  accept it and don't give up.  don't let the temporary discomfort keep you from the glory.

namaste bitches, xx


work bitch (twerk remix), spitney brears

9.24.13

inappropriate yogini

since starting my photo project in december of 2008 alot of changes have occurred; as they do in 5 years of life.  i turned the photo project - at least one photo everyday - into a blog and an obsession, an obsession that completely turned my life around.  what started as a tool to help me with my sobriety, my one day at a time mentality, became a visual journal of my life and motivated me to make my life more interesting in order to have more interesting photos.  i quickly realized that far, far too much of my time was spent in an office and i decided to change that.  this caused me to start hiking alot, adventuring alot, getting out into the world in order to find my one photo of the day.  eventually i quit my job, got rid of my things and became a wanderer, in search of adventure and of course - the photo.  

in it's time this blog has been the photo journal of a photographer, a vagabond, a gypsy, a traveler, a pirate, a farmer, a dreamer and a doer.  now it's the journal of a yoga instructor.  it's seen me sober and un-sober, sick and healthy, poor, rich, poor again, rich again, single, coupled, single again and completely in love.  it's inspired me, annoyed me, comforted me, guilt-tripped me, and delighted me.  it's recorded my many homes; tents, tree-houses, cabins, mansions in cities and mountains and beaches around the world.  it's reconnected me with people i thought i'd lost, kept me connected with family who had no idea if i was even alive and it's been a way for my friends to know my life even when i'd seemingly dropped off the face of the earth.  this blog is a real documentation of my life.  however, lately i've felt a disconnect, perhaps because once again i've evolved and my blog format hasn't quite caught up.  there is a huge part of my life that isn't being properly represented.  as cliche as it sounds (and i know that it does) 

yoga has changed my life.

this new chapter i'm living, this holistic chapter, i'm living to the fullest and yet my blog is still the journal of a traveling photographer.  the thing that excites me most during the day is teaching and practicing and....... fucking making hummus and the photo i post is.......... the beach.  i don't know....

anyway i'm going to attempt to evolve my blog a little here.  it may not happen all at once and it may prove really annoying to blog followers.  but whatever, i'm gonna get yogasmic and see where it goes. 

namaste bitches, xx.

9.19.13

back on the wagon

I’ve recently decided to go back to being an herbivore.  This is not my first foray into vegetarianism.  Through no choice of my own I was forced to become one when my brother, aged uh.. 4, declared that he would no longer partake of meat.  Somehow our whole family got roped into this.  John started eating meat again after some time but I held out for almost 14 years.  Although at the end there I occasionally started eating fish.  I lived in California at the time which is a magical place full of people who were quick to tell me ‘you’re not a vegetarian you’re a pescatarian,’ which was true.  And also really, really annoying.

Anyway, after gleefully partaking in flesh for a few years I’m jumping back on the vegetarian bandwagon.  I’d love to say this is for some morally superior reason (...ahem. ahimsa.)  It’s not.  I’m doing a lot of yoga lately and find that I practice, focus and meditate more effectively when my body feels light, i.e. when it’s not digesting meat and other heavy shit.  I will never be one of those people who shames meat eaters – I made bacon ice cream for christssake.  The jig is up.  

I may lapse occasionally.  My family hunts and ergo I have access to large amounts of lean, grassfed, organic meat.  (And to those who say “don’t eat anything you wouldn’t be willing to kill yourself” and assume that I’m burning in shame/smugly content – I’m not.  I was that.)  But I’m gonna do my best and give it a go. 

One reason I wanted to start eating meat again was because I wanted to learn how to prepare and cook it.  I was getting way into the culinary arts and felt I was missing out on a huge portion of cuisine.  Which I was.  Conversely once I became a meat eater I sadly neglected all the interesting and delicious veggie dishes out there.   I’m coming back to them now.  I will probably occasionally post recipes here along with other holisticky stuff.  Hope you enjoy it.   

Namaste bitches, xx