8.5.15

morning meditation

4.19.14

 

garudasana

i'm sort of slacking on the yoga-ness of the blog lately.  i am still, in my life, practicing yoga.  but we've moved back to the states, i haven't been teaching and i'm feeling uninspirational.  i'm learning a lesson lately, having nothing to do with asana and having everything to do with acceptance.

i'm learning about accepting life's unexpected trials, accepting another imperfect person's imperfections, accepting my own.  i'm learning about not struggling to change what i can't change.  i'm learning about allowing.  these are hard for me.  as a perfectionist and a control-freak i subconsciously (or consciously) feel like my actions can dictate outcomes.  but sometimes, especially when it comes to other people and their behaviors, they can't.  sometimes it's best to just realize that control is a complete illusion.

it's liberating, also scary, this acceptance trip.  it requires courage, trust, love and faith even as it tests those virtues.  when you're a fighter and a survivor the instinct to struggle and overcome is as vital as oxygen.  but to evolve you have to lay aside these instincts - rooted as they are in fear and restriction - and you have to allow.  so that's what i've been working on lately; allowing.  accepting. and loving.

but here's a yoga pose anyway, for good measure.  namaste bitches, xx.

"To find ease and a feeling of freedom in the pose, it might help to think about the myths behind Garudasana's name. Garuda, though often translated as "eagle," is actually a mythical bird in the Hindu and Buddhist traditions. As the vehicle of the god Vishnu, Garuda is said to be the king of birds. In Tibetan traditions, the garudas are considered a magical species; they are often described as "outrageous" because of their extraordinary ability to fly and fly and fly... and never land. They never have to land because they never get tired. And they never get tired because they ride the wind.
In Garudasana your body might feel awkward and constricted, but you can still ride the wind like an eagle. "Riding the wind" means riding the flow or energy of any situation or any challenging pose. Not to be confused with going with the flow or getting bowled over by circumstances, riding the energy of a situation means remaining open to what is occurring and finding a way to become stable, spacious, and steady within that situation, without resistance. When you resist, you're more likely to get tired and give up. In Garudasana, resistance will likely cause you to tense up and lose your balance. But when you stay open to possibilities, even when faced with obstacles, you may find that your energy renews itself endlessly." 
-yoga journal

2.4.14

i've gotten to the point in my practice where it's automatic.  i don't even think about fitting it in to my day.  i just do it.  so this morning i found myself unrolling my mat even as my mind was a million miles away.  i looked down at it, and realized with dismay that my inner turmoil was going to make this a very difficult practice.  i sat down anyway.  i started breathing.  i felt like crying.  i just kept breathing.

i warmed up, still battling troubling thoughts, going through the motions. then i went into my first down dog and felt it.  release.  it was like a giant swoosh moving through my whole body.  a giant swoosh of peace.  it felt like physically remembering every time i've ever held this pose; so many moments all over the world and through time.  and in that moment i glimpsed another facet of my practice and another reason i do yoga.  no matter what is going on in my mind and my life, when i get on my mat, when i start breathing and focusing and stretching, i achieve timelessness.  my body changes, my experience of each pose changes, but there is something consistent in the practice and this removes it from 'today' and elevates it into now and also always.... it's momentary, but infinite.

this is comforting, and amazing.... and also true.

1.18.14

 

svasana day

this man is full of wisdom and humor and is still busting no hands headstands well into his 70's.  thank you sri dharma mittra, for the inspirational day.

"you are not cell phone;  you are signal." 

"you get older and every year lose more poses.  until in the end one pose remains; svasana." 

~sri dharma mittra

12.19.13

the light in me...

"a vase, like a building, like a body, has two spaces - the one that it contains and the one that surrounds it.  when we begin asana we worry about the shape of the pose, that is, how we look in the mirror, in other words, the space we exclude.  by now we should be worrying about the space we include, the space within, for it is largely that which gives true life and beauty to the asana.  it is called yoga svarupa - the self assuming its perfect form through yoga.  that is achieved through the inner distribution of space.  essentially that is how yogasana becomes effortless, with the natural beauty of molten gold being poured from a vat."
~ bks iyengar

i love love love this quote from light on life.  for most of us, those not trained formally in dance or gymnastics, etc,  the body can feel like a heavy weight that we're lugging around and attempting to manipulate.  we don't occupy every bit of it, living mostly in our minds.  we forget that the universe, or space, is always expanding, and that our physical bodies are made up mostly of space.  that same energy of expansion is within us.  
one of the best things about deepening my yoga practice has been becoming familiar with the inner space and the amazing and expansive nature of my inner self.  through steady practice, meditation and effort i have begun to occupy each room in my house, spreading from my mind down throughout my body.  when i want to move my foot for a giant step it is no longer being done from a distance.  my mind is no longer yelling down the chain of command, 'hey leg, drag that thing up here' my mind is in my foot, and my leg, and everything moves as one.  
to some people this is going to sound like some crazy hippy nonsense i know.  and it's early, i'm still drinking my coffee; maybe not the best time to convey philosophical musings but what it comes down to is this: as you practice yoga shift your concern from how you look in the pose to how you feel in the pose.  start to move from this inner feeling.  all the things that are always being repeated, remember to breathe, be present, blah blah, they are all helpful tools to get you to

this moment
in life
in space.
which you are.  

namaste bitches, xx.